i’m pretty sure it’s because of all the stress i’ve been under.

i never get sick

 fuck this!

i don’t even know what kind of sickness it is.

it’s like a mix of a sore throat and a stomach bug and a headache and everything you could possibly think of but a fever.

what the fuck.

i’m off to madison/milwaukee to meet up with the roomie for the last time before august! and then we’re headed off to a brewers vs twins game! wooot woot! lets hope that the twins can pull off a win so i have bragging rights! 

4 hour long ride with cedric stands in the way of me and a wonderful weekend! wooohoo!

SEE YA LAAATERR MPLS!

so i’m getting super nervous for my summer job.

i’m scared that it’s going to be nothing like i remembered it as a kid.

and i’m just scared i’m going to hate it. and then there goes my whole summer.

i’m trying to keep a positive attitude because i will for sure hate it if i go in there with a negative attitude.

it’s just, scary to think that i’m going to be up there for 8 weeks. no escape.

eeeek!

so much to do before next week. i have to pack and get all of my forms in. blah. stressful!

looking forward to a relaxing weekend in wisconsin with maggot and cedric. bring on the baseball!

life can be so confusing.

i firmly believe most things happen for a reason.

but i can’t figure this one out.

you know that feeling when you are in such deep thought that your eyes just glaze over? yeah. definitely just had that for a good 3 minutes straight.

finals suck

people suck

i just want to sleep

but i NEEEED to pass this class

i just want to die.

i honestly feel like i am living in hell.

kill me now.

i am going CRAZY.

FUCK CHEMISTRY.

I lay here thinking to myself that in 3 days I will be laying in this bed for the last time. On Saturday, I will be locking the door of e218 for the very last time ever. And I sit here and think who will be lucky enough to have our huge room with a beautiful view of Minneapolis next year. Part of me wants to come back and creep next year. Part of me just wants to leave it as it is and keep the memories. I have such a problem with leaving things thing and making new life’s steps. Ive never realized how hard change is for me until this year. So many memories, I’m scared of losing them. Im scared of losing all of the friendships and laughs and great things that have happened in this dorm room. It’s crazy for me to think. I just know that on Friday night I will probably not be getting any sleep because all i will be thinking is “this is my last time in this bed”. And then in the morning, ” this is my last time climbing down this go forsaken bed that squeaks like none other”. I wish these kinds of things weren’t so hard for me. I cant tell if tears will be shed in saturday, but I’m thinking it just might be a yes. WHY AM I SO PATHETIC.

i actually comprehend chemistry today!

i’m so excited!

optimism has worked!!

woohoooo!!!!!!

i think its  time for me to go to bed.

fresh start in the morning.

i am determined to get this stuff down.

new goal: not to say i’m going to fail this test. i need to be positive!

it’s going to be okay.

i am going to pass this class.

i can do this.

i hope this positive attitude is still present in the morning.